January 21, 2009 at 12:07 a.m.
Hello,
I don’t know how to start this. I figured I could usher you, the reader, in with a well thought metaphor or perhaps a quote from Shakespeare to really give rationale for my writing, but you are smart I think. If you’re like me, you like truth. I promise you this; I will be true in what I write and what you read. I pledge to be so honest that I’ll even admit to having my dictionary and thesaurus handy just in case I need help in conveying what my normal vocabulary is not capable of. I don’t even know if this is writing etiquette, but if I could I would like to ask you a favor in honor of my honesty. I ask that you read and know that my heart is in every word. Please throw out ideas like, “this can’t be true” or “naivety.” Now that we have been able to set some guidelines, I believe I should get on with my story. But, before you read the next paragraph, there’s one more thing: Stop and close your eyes for a second. Then I want you to picture every ending to every movie that has left you with those little chilly bumps on your arms, lump in your throat or even the ones where 10 minutes later after the credits roll, you’re eyes are puffy from a good cry. Once you’re done read on. Blessings on your reading journey.
David
-It started with a smile.-
It was my first year at George Fox University. During the first week of school, there was a carnival outside in the quad. I had fun meeting as many people as I could, especially the girls. There was food and music and games of all sorts. I ran around and tried everything, excited to become apart of a new community. My friend Joel and I joined in a pickup volleyball game on the lawn and rotated in with other people. I was half socializing and playing, so the game moved pretty fast. There was a girl there. Curly as hair could be it bobbed up and down as she and I played and talked. I guarantee you I thought she was cute the moment I saw her there. We talked and laughed and then Joel and I left. I said goodbye to her and never talked to her again from September to December. I forgot that we had even met.
I wrote my first poem in eighth grade. It was about love.
I grew up with a sister who taught me how to treat a girl with respect and chivalry. She instilled the value of romance and I believed I had a major responsibility to love and actually mean it. I never had the opportunity to be loved back. I thought I had loved before, but I was young and naive (Shh...I know I told you not to think about that word, but really I had no other good word in the thesaurus...continue, I’m sorry). This may sound like a country song, but I am confident in saying that if love is true, it has to be both given and received. I don’t think I had ever experienced it. I was the great friend. The “big brother.” I considered my life was directing me to only be this and therefore I felt inadequate. I wasn’t getting to sweep any girls off there feet. I would even go as far to say that I had never even seen a true smile from myself. I realize now that it was for an amazing curly-haired reason.
Second semester. I am a film major at George Fox so I signed up for an Introduction to Video Production class. There was about 20 people in the class. I am almost 24 so categorizing myself as the class clown would make me sound foolish. I’m respectful, but I do say anything that might sound funny out loud, and again, usually in good respectful timing. It was the first day of class and I was sitting in the front row, as I did with all my classes. I had said something and the whole class laughed. I heard a laugh that made my ears perk and I looked behind me. She was sitting in the very last row directly diagonal to me. I kid you not, everyone was looking back at the teacher and it was just me and her.
She smiled.
Have you ever been knocked out before? Passed out from fainting or hitting your head? I have. When you wake up, it really is real life slow motion. It is inexplainable. When I looked at her and saw that smile, it was real life slow motion. I actually blushed and turned away from her. It was Jenny Brown. The girl from the volleyball game. That moment I muttered something under my breath that she was the one. But I didn’t give it to much thought. I had already told the guys in my house that I would be single for that semester.
That night I had an orientation meeting for the school’s radio program. My friend Aaron and I had signed up for a spot to have our own radio show on KFOX that semester which is something we had always wanted to do. I had been watching a girls basketball game so I wanted to get back to it.
She walked in the room and I forgot about basketball, radios and shows. She had the cutest red shorts and slippers on. I knew I wasn’t being a gentleman, but her shorts displayed her legs, beautiful and soft (honesty remember) and I made a couple glances at them, while trying to still hold a gentleman’s integrity. The meeting was soon over and I worked up enough courage to ask her what she was doing afterwards. I swallowed any fear that I did have and asked if she wanted to join me to watch the end of the game. When she said yes, the nerves I had came out in the form of sweaty hands. We walked to the gym asking each other general questions. When we got to the gym I found Joel and Jenny and I took a seat in front of him. She started talking to a girl beside her and I turned around and looked at Joel and raised my eyebrows. He mouthed, “What the frick?!” I shrugged and mouthed “I don’t know!” Jenny and I talked for awhile and somehow we started talking about the movie, “Horton Hears A Who.” She told me that she owned it and I said that I really wanted to see it. We decided that we would watch it the next day. I was feeling excited. Later she left to go to the bathroom. I got up and paced near the door half watching the game half wondering how I was going to ask for her number. She came back and we stood there watching the game. I looked at her and finally asked if we could exchange numbers so we could hang out again. I pulled out my iPhone and she got excited and asked if we could switch phones to put our numbers in. I gave her mine. I flipped up her phone and the color from my face left along with my breath and a sad sinking feeling came over me. There was a picture of her and a boy on her phone. “Is that your boyfriend?” I asked trying to sound unaffected by my unfortunate discovery. “Yes.” And like that my crush had to end. I made a promise to myself as a gentleman to never involve myself with a girl that was spoken for. Then I realized that I had made plans with her for the next day. I decided it would be okay, because we wouldn’t be by ourselves, which would be a huge “no no” in my book.
It was Wednesday. Jenny came over and I gave her a tour of our house and introduced her to my housemates. I took her into the living room and showed her our collection of rootbeer bottles that had been placed on the fireplace mantle. She stood up on the fireplace and looked at all of them. I stood somewhat behind her and watched her. She was beautiful. She turned around and looked down at me. I instantly became nervous. I could’ve kissed her right there, I can’t tell you why, but I felt like I was in a movie. We stared at each other. She started leaning towards me, eyes locked. I had no idea what was going on. “What are you doing?” I asked trying to not be outwardly nervous. “This!” She said as she flung her arms around me and gave me a hug. I felt so happy that she did that, but it was almost inappropriate to me. I didn’t really hug her back, instead I gave her a little pat on the back and tried to move on from the hug.
We watched the movie and I didn’t want to talk during it so I started texting her. Just telling her that I was glad she came over. I had to make sure anytime that we text that I didn’t say anything that could be confusing for the both of us.
Thursday came. Jenny and I had two classes that day together so we had been talking most of that day. It was movie night at our house. Well, really every night was movie night at our house but we were watching a horror movie that night so I invited Jenny over again, early before so I could show her “Nacho Libré” a movie she said she hadn’t seen. During that day I had been just watching her smile at me, which was nearly all the time. I couldn’t get over it. I had even prayed to God that there was something special about this girl. Something really different. I asked Him for wisdom, grace and understanding for this girl. During the movie I turned to her and said, “Wanna know something?” She said “Yes.”
“I know your smile.”
“What do you mean?”
I began to just describe everything I had noticed about it. How her lips rest perfectly above her teeth, and that her cheeks rose just enough to still be able to see her blue eyes. And how her nose wrinkles ever so slightly. I really had studied it and was confident in telling her what I thought about it.
“Thank you David.”
We continued to watch the movie. We started talking about who she hangs out with. I asked her what guys she hung out with, she said no one. Which made me wonder why she hung out with me.
“So why me?”
She looked at me for a moment and as if she had planned on saying this to me for a long time she said,
“Because you know my smile.”
My eyes became wider than they’ve ever been and I turned quickly away and held back a giant smile. In my head I kept thinking, “That was exactly like something from a movie!” “That’s something you’d hear in a movie!” I couldn’t believe what I had just heard. I finally told her that what she said sounded like something from a movie. She said she surprised herself by saying that. I knew then that I was actually falling for her. I didn’t know what to do.
To be continued....
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